Caryn Young

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  • The identity of flags

    This is a time of great festivity in England. 
    Queen Elizabeth, who has reigned for an unprecedented 70 years,  is being feted by her nation to celebrate this auspicious milestone. 
    Earlier today, as the 96 year old Queen appeared on the famous balcony at Buckingham Palace to receive her subjects, the journalist who was commenting on the scene narrated that the Queen stood on this very same balcony, with her father, who was then King, in 1945, at the end of World War Two. 
    This brought me to tears because my dear mother, a refugee from Germany, was witness to that event. She was eternally grateful to Great Britain for providing her a safe haven when she escaped Germany at the brink of war. She suffered the Blitz in England and many of the challenges of wartime, but was fully aware of the miracle of her escape from the clutches of the Nazis. She often speaks of the bravery of the royal family, who did not run away from London during the Blitz, throwing their lot together with the lives of their countrymen which exhibited true leadership. 
    I felt very emotional seeing this diminutive woman who symbolizes strength in the face of adversity, the picture of royalty in our time. 
    As my Mother’s father lived in London for the rest of his life, my Mom would take us to England every summer, to spend time with him. We enjoyed many of the sights, and watched the famous Changing of the Guards at Buckingham Palace many a time. 
    Another ceremonial event that took place annually in London is called the Trooping of the Color. It is performed by regiments of the British army as they perform a complicated march in formation while carrying their colors, or their regimental flags. The Trooping is a moving testimony to the allegiance of the regiments to their sovereign as the maneuver in formation. 
    This week’s Torah portion is called BaMidbar, which means in the desert, and it describes what life was like for the Jewish nation while they sojourned in the desert, in the wilderness. 
    The Torah describes the encampment of the nation which was set up in a square. The 12 Tribes were divided into four sections, with 3 tribes encamped on each of the four sides of the square. Each Tribe had a unique flag, or banner, under which each Tribe dwelt.
    Each flag had its own color for the Tribe it represented which corresponded to the colored stone on the breastplate of the High Priest which had the Tribe’s name engraved upon it. 
    The flag also sported an insignia which represented the distinct characteristic of the Tribe. For example, the Tribe of Judah had a picture of a lion. 
    (Hence the concept of Lion of Judah). 
    The flags would identify the essential mission of the Tribe in their service of Gd. 
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  • How do we walk with the Mitzvot?

    I was a little tired the other day as I was heading out to do an errand in my neighborhood. 
    All of a sudden I arrived at my destination. I honestly do not remember how I got there. 
    Scary as it seems, I was on automatic pilot, navigating the familiar route without focus or much attention. I did get there, but I missed a lot along the way. 
    We are concluding the book of Leviticus this week. Many weeks ago we started the journey in this book which is called in Hebrew VaYikra which means “and he called”. It refers to the loving manner in which Gd speaks to Moses. 
    If you would look in a Torah scroll you would see that the the word VaYikra, has its final letter aleph, written in a smaller font, so to speak, then the rest of the letters. That makes the word look like it’s actually spelling VaYikar, which has a totally different interpretation. Without the aleph the word no longer means he called out, but rather it means he happened upon. 
    This reflects Moses humility when he was writing the Torah. He did not want it to seem that Gd singled him out and reached out specifically, but rather it was just happenstance. 
    Moshe was just another guy, in the right place at the right time. 
    This weeks Torah portion, Bechokosai, which means in my  laws, “happens” to use a similar word. 
    The verse states, “If you behave casually with me” is a warning to us regarding our relationship with Gd. In the verse the word for casual is “keri” the same root word as VaYikra. In other words do not relate to Gd casually, as if you just happened to run into Gd. 
    Furthermore, the portion talks about observing the Mitzvot and commandments but uses another interesting choice of words. Literally the verse says, 
    “If you will walk in my laws”. 
    Shouldn’t we observe the laws, not walk in them?
    And what serendipity!
    In the verse that exhorts us not to behave casually, it literally says “if you will walk with me casually”…
    It doesn’t seem a happenstance walk with Gd is what we are aiming to achieve. 
    The metaphor of walking which repeats itself is the message of growth. An angel, according to Jewish mysticism, has only one leg. 
    An angel has the spiritual energy to complete its mission, but it has no choice, it must proceed, like a robot, to complete its task. 
    A human being has choice, where and how to walk, to continually grow and expand. 
    We are constantly presented with options and we can decide to purposefully walk with Gd or meander through life thinking there is no purpose to our existence, that it’s just a matter of chance. 
    How do we walk with the Mitzvot?
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  • Life Is Like A Game Of Scrabble

    I just returned from a trip to Israel. I am blessed to visit with my Mother who lives in Jerusalem, and spend some wonderful quality time with her. I appreciate every minute I am gifted with my Mother’s company. 
    We played a lot of Scrabble. 
    I love a good game of Scrabble. The challenge of creating words out of disparate letters is one I relish. Of course taking the jumble of letters and creating a 7 letter word is especially satisfying. 
    The longer the word, the greater the points. 
    This is a common place illustration of the importance of a word, especially a well constructed one. 
    This week’s Torah portion is called Behar and one of the topics it addresses is words. 
    The Portion continues the theme of holiness which has been the focus of the past few portions. First the Torah had addressed the holiness in our relationship with Gd and now it shifts to holiness in the foundation of Jewish society. 
    In Behar the Torah states that one person is not allowed to afflict another. This injunction is actually mentioned twice.
    What does it mean to afflict someone? 
    There are two ways one can afflict another. 
    One way is by negatively affecting or harming someone’s money or property. 
    An interesting application of this law regards window shopping, a widely accepted practice many of us enjoy. 
    What could be wrong with window shopping?
    Imagine you are a shop keeper and someone enters the store. 
    Your antennae goes up!
    A potential customer. Immediately your hopes rise in anticipation of a sale. 
    If the shopper had absolutely no intention to buy anything the shopper is afflicting the shop owner  by giving a false impression that a sale may be imminent. 
    Why is this action prohibited?
    Simply because it will disappoint the seller.
    This is one act of affliction that is to be avoided. 
    Why?
    Because it will cause someone pain. 
    That level of sensitivity creates a refined spirit. 
    The Talmud states that if one enters a store with absolutely no intention to make a purchase,it is prohibited. 
    Do not panic. 
    All is not lost. 
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  • Be A Mensch

    Be a mensch!
    Did anyone ever tell you that? (Like your Mom? In dulcet tones, maybe when you were acting up a bit in public?)
    What does being a mensch even mean?
    The Oxford English Dictionary defines a mensch as a person of honor and dignity. 
    Still not quite sure what the parameters are of being a mensch. 
    Perhaps the following story is an example of menschlickeit, the action of being a mensch. 
    In 1948 Alaska Airlines president James Wooten had purchased some surplus transport aircraft from the US military. He really was not sure what to do with his purchase. Then he was apprised of a need and stepped into the breach. 
    After the declaration of the State of Israel in 1948, violence erupted in the Middle East. One of the areas of conflict was Yemen, and the Jewish population of Yemen was attacked and persecuted. They were desperate to escape to Israel. They could not travel by boat as the Egyptian army was patrolling the Gulf of Aqaba, so Operation on Wings of Eagles was launched. James Wooten was contacted and he oversaw 450 flights transporting Yemeni Jews to Israel. He used his newly purchased cargo planes. Many of these flights he piloted personally. This was a dangerous operation, avoiding enemy airspace and often enemy fire, flying long stints and taking turns to get much needed sleep. Other challenges included the fact that this ancient Jewish community had never seen an airplane before and despite the danger, were hesitant to board the aircraft. “Despite many challenges Alaska Airlines proudly executed the mission without a single loss of life” (courtesy of Mishpocha Magazine)
    Would James Wooten be considered a mensch?
    I think so!
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  • We Should Be The First To Say Hello

    This week we have experienced many emotions. 
    First there was Yom Hazikaron, Israel’s Memorial Day, a day dedicated to fallen soldiers and civilian victims of terror. 
    This somber day of appreciation of those who made the ultimate sacrifice, giving up their lives for the safety of the Jewish people, is immediately followed by Yom HaAtzmaut, Israel’s Independence Day, the day when the State of Israel was formally established in May of 1948. 
    The linking of these two days is clear- we owe our independence to the soldiers who sacrificed their lives for it. 
    This year the cycle was closed with a return to tragedy as Yom Haatzmaut ended and a terror attack against Israeli civilians resulted in the death of three fathers, leaving 16 orphans. 
    This act was applauded by the terror organization in a statement. 
    One of the Dad’s who was murdered is portrayed in a picture with a wide and engaging smile. His friends and neighbors say he was someone who always had a smile on his face and was always eager to assist others. 
    His name was Yonatan Chabakuk and everyone in his city knew him. 
    He always had a smile. 
    He leaves behind a wife and ten children. 
    Our hearts are broken and we cry for their loss. 
    This week’s Torah portion is called Kedoshim, which means holy ones. 
    At the beginning of the Parsha we are commanded to be holy. 
    What follows are the steps, the Mitzvot, by which we can attain holiness. 
    One might assume that the theme of reaching spiritual heights would be by abstaining from worldly pleasures and by removing oneself as much as possible from the mundane of life. 
    Yet the theme of the commandments which bring us to holiness include honoring parents, pursuing righteousness and loving your neighbor as yourself. As well as the injunction not to steal, or tell lies, or delay paying a day worker their salary. We are told not to gossip or place a stumbling block in front of another, not to bear a grudge, take revenge and to stand up for the elderly!
    All these are part and parcel of real life - the components of interpersonal relationships that form the fabric of our lives. 
    We become holy when we elevate every aspect of our daily life. 
    When we smile at one another. 
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    JWC Atlanta creates and builds a spiritual community that connects women through friendship, learning and Jewish values and transforms and impacts them, their families and the Atlanta Jewish community.


  • After The Death

    Today was Yom HaShoah, the annual Holocaust Remembrance Day. 
    It is a solemn day which focuses on the six million Jews who were murdered by the Nazis in World War 2. 
    In Israel, at 10 a.m in the morning, sirens blare throughout the country. 
    For what seems an endless two minutes, sirens wail mournfully and the country comes to a standstill to honor those who perished. 
    It is eerie to see what unfolds when the siren sounds. 
    People literally stop in place, drivers pull over and stand somberly near their cars, everything becomes frozen in time. 
    Today, something very precious  coincided with the sounding of the siren. 
    A 90 year old Holocaust survivor, Mr. Nathan Weinberg, was serving as a Sandek, the honor of holding the baby, at his great grandson’s Brit Milah. Wrapped in his talit and teffilin, Mr. Weinberg held the baby on his lap while it was being lovingly ushered into the holy covenant of theJewish people. 
    As the Brit was concluding the siren rang out. 
    The officiants paused, and the camera focused on the emotional expression on the great grandfather’s face as the baby and the siren wailed in synchronization. 
    The emotion in the room was palpable. 
    The crying of new life in concert with the siren which represents death, symbolized  Mr. Weinberg’s victory.  
    He defeated the Nazis by building a life in the face of his loss. 
    At this Brit, he is celebrating the birth of his 49th great grandchild. 
    This is Mr. Weinberg’s personal victory over Hitler, building eternity after a long, dark chapter of death and destruction. 
    This week’s Torah portion is called Acharei Mot, which means after the death. 
    It refers to the time after the death of two of Aaron the High Priest’s sons. 
    After that tragic event, Gd teaches Aaron about the sanctity of the Tabernacle and the holiness of the Yom Kippur holiday. 
    Rabbi Yaakov Bender, beloved Torah leader in New York, shares a beautiful thought to help us understand a relevant message. 
    Aaron responded to the tragedy of this unspeakable loss, in silence. 
    He faced the pain with dignity and calm. 
    This is not because Aaron was unable to speak. He was well known as the master mediator who brought peace amongst those who were in conflict. Aaron was also chosen by Gd to be his brother Moses spokesman, so he clearly is a man of words, but in this instance Aaron remains quiet, here he chose silence. 
    Rabbi Bender explains that this is only part of Aaron’s response. The other reaction was his filling the void left by his loss with more holiness. He created and built a new reality in the Tabernacle that would replace what had been lost.
    Because of this elevated response, Gd spoke directly to Aaron and taught him the laws regarding holiness in the Tabernacle. Specifically, that a priest may not participate in the Temple service in a state of intoxication. 
    This law was transmitted in a direct speech between Gd and Aaron. 
    Just as Aaron sanctified himself by NOT speaking inappropriately, Gd honored him by speaking to him directly. 
    Our Sages teach us that while a drunkard may be more excited in his spiritual yearnings, he is not serene, and without composure he cannot fully experience the sanctity of the moment. 
    Gd was telling Aaron, you showed your faith by reacting to this blow with calm and composure, you will therefore merit being the one to teach all that Divine service can only be done with composure and concentration. 
    In this way, Aaron was able to teach one and all there is a chapter that comes “after the death”, he modeled that there can be life after a very dark chapter. 
    (We are not on the level of Aaron’s spiritual development, nor were we intended to aspire to that level. He was the High Priest, and we are not expected to respond as he did, but we can glean the lesson he modeled of finding strength to move on)
    That is the chapter of 
    “after the death”. 
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  • A Nachshon Moment

    We worked so hard!!
    We planned, shopped, prepared, cooked, and ate. 
    A lot. 
    And Passover is passing us by. The final days of the holiday are upon us. 
    What spiritual energy is in the air? 
    What choices can we make to take the power of Passover with us, long after the matza crumbs have been swept away?
    The final days of Passover celebrate the splitting of the sea. Therefore they are celebrated as a major festival, as they testify to this seminal event. 
    Over 3000 years ago, the Jewish people escaped Egypt. When The Egyptian leader, Pharaoh, realized he had allowed his slave force to flee, he had second thoughts. He corralled his army and gave chase to the Jewish nation. He cornered them at the edge of the Sea of Reeds. 
    The Jewish people were trapped. 
    Before them lay the sea and behind them the approaching Egyptian army. There seemed to be no escape. 
    Moses raised his voice in prayer and Gd told him this is not the time for prayer, this is a time for action, the people should just go forth. 
    Easier said than done. 
    Going forward seemed suicide by drowning. 
    One man, Nachshon the son of Aminadav, who was the Prince of the Tribe of Judah, took the charge to heart and began walking forward into the water. 
    He continued walking as the water lapped around his ankles and he did not stop as the water rose until it reached his nose, and when it seemed his demise was inevitable, the unimaginable happened and the sea split. 
    This Friday we commemorate that event that took place 3,334 years ago. 
    We remember the person whose faith and initiative made it happen. 
    The Talmud teaches us that a person can actualize their potential, complete their mission in one moment, in one hour, so to speak. 
    That was Nachshon’s moment. 
    He changed the trajectory of history with his action. 
    It was heroic and historic. 
    A Nachshon moment. 
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  • The Link in the Chain

    A woman I knew most of my life , an acquaintance of my Mom’s, passed away recently. 
    She was an elegant woman. 
    Always well dressed.
    She had an air about her. 
    She was very quiet and refined. 
    Even as a young child, I always noticed her. 
    Despite her presence, I always assumed she was just a regular person. 
    I had no idea!
    I only found out many years later,  that this woman had played a unique role in Jewish history. 
    She had survived horrors and had exhibited bravery under terrible conditions. 
    Her name was Mimi Reinhard, and she was Oskar Schindler’s secretary. 
    She was actually the one who typed up the famous Schindler’s list. 
    She had not only typed the list that saved thousands, she also surreptitiously added some names to the list herself and was instrumental in saving others from the jaws of death. 
    A number of years ago she made Aliya and moved to Israel. 
    Perhaps her family in Israel alerted the media, who welcomed her as a hero when she arrived. 
    Her former acquaintances were duly shocked as she had not discussed her role in this life saving mission.
    Mimi Reinhard died last week at the age of 107. 
    No ordinary person at all. 
    Friday evening we will begin celebrating the holiday of Passover. 
    It is a time to reflect on the fact that the Jewish nation was redeemed from their servitude and were able to begin a trajectory of a national mission. 
    The purpose of the Seder is to relate the story and the mission therein to our children. This is done through conversation and questions and answers. 
    The word Pesach, the Hebrew word for Passover, alludes to the fact that Gd “passed over” the homes of the Jewish nation during the final Plague, the Plague of the first born. 
    Pesach is also a conjugation of two Hebrew words 
    Peh - the mouth
    Sach - speaks or converses
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  • Be A Jew Who Left Egypt

    A second Israeli astronaut is taking off for outer space. 
    Tomorrow, Eytan Stibbe, will be embarking on a mission, dubbed Rakia, which means sky in Hebrew, to travel to the International Space Station. 
    Among the items he will bring along, are some fragments of a diary that belonged to his friend and colleague, Ilan Ramon of blessed memory, the first Israeli astronaut who perished 19 years ago. 
    Fifteen minutes before it was scheduled to land, the Columbia Space Shuttle with Ramon aboard, burst apart, killing all the crew and leaving smoldering wreckage in its wake. 
    A huge recovery project was launched to find as much of the wreckage as possible. 
    A Native American tracker, who was involved in the search for the debris, came upon a small pile of papers in a field in Palestine, Texas. 
    This pile of paper turned out to be the writings of the Israeli astronaut. 
    Miraculously, a part of Ilan Ramon’s diary survived the crash. 
    Rona Ramon, Ilan’s widow, was given the bundle of papers, and she brought the remains of the diary back to Israel in the hope it could be deciphered. 
    It was brought to the Division of Identification and Forensic Science of the Israeli Police and given to Chief Superintendent, Sharon Brown, my first cousin, who is a documents expert. 
    Using the sophisticated tools of her trade, Sharon was able to recover the writing on some of the pages. She was amazed to see that Ilan had taken the time to write out the entire Friday night Kiddush, including the vowels, so he would accurately pronounce each word. It seemed important to him to make this declaration properly. 
    My cousin is quoted as saying 
    “I was a puddle of tears when I saw that. He took to heart how he represented all of us.”
    He did this by declaring to the world that Gd created this Universe and took the Jewish nation out of Egypt, as stated in the words of the Kiddush. 
    After her ground breaking work, Sharon was left with one page on which she could only decipher the words in Biblical Hebrew for the Jewish People and the word for Sea. She couldn’t imagine what Ramon was writing. 
    All of a sudden she had a brain storm. 
    She looked to see what the Parsha was the week of the mission. 
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  • Shabbat HaChodesh

    It’s been a very challenging time these past days. 
    We have heard of our precious brethren in Israel being senselessly murdered in cold blood. 
    How are we to move forward in the face of such pain?
    Sivan Rahav Meir, Israeli Torah teacher and news correspondent, shared a letter that was written by a third grade student to the family of his murdered teacher, Rabbi Avishai Yechezkel of blessed memory. 
    In his letter, the student wrote poignantly about the role model his teacher was and the excitement he brought daily  to the lessons, and the joy he created in the classroom. 
    The student mentioned a number of specific lessons that he learned from his teacher:
    Always care for the feelings of your friend
    Study well
    Be nice to your friends
    Be careful with your speech. 
    The student concludes the long letter by saying his teacher never missed an opportunity to teach his class important life lessons and signs off telling the family
    “You were privileged to have a father like this”!
    This was written by a third grader. 
    What a teacher - and what a student!
    This coming Shabbat is called Shabbat HaChodesh as we read from the Torah portion that explains the commandment of sanctifying the new month. 
    Our Sages teach us this is an indication that this is a time of renewal, an opportunity to create a fresh start. 
    This commandment was given to the Jewish people while they were still in Egypt. 
    In Hebrew, Egypt is called Mitzrayim. A maytzar is a strait, a very narrow place. While we were in the darkest hour in the most depraved place, Gd showed us that we can start afresh and move forward. 
    Each and every one of us have our own personal Egypt, that narrow place that does not allow us to expand to our fullest  potential, we have to remember  that we are not mired in the old story. 
    One falls into routine. 
    We feel stuck and unable to move forward. But this time of year has the spiritual energy to propel us forward. 
    To renew. 
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  • Types of Silence

    I am not a sports fan. 
    When my children were growing up, they loved baseball,  and were thrilled to attend a game at any opportunity. 
    At some point, the kids noticed that I always had an excuse not to join them. 
    I realized I needed to bite the bullet and go with my kids to one of those games and share an experience that was so important to them. 
    Now this is when I am really venturing into true confessions. 
    I brought along a book. 
    Just in case. 
    I cannot tell you one thing about the game, other than we seemed to be sitting very far from the ground. 
    But the book…it was awesome, I completed it by the bottom of the ninth. 
    I had squirreled away in my bag a book entitled “Tuesdays with Morrie”. If you haven’t had a chance to read it, this is a true story of the end of life conversations a student had with his favorite college professor. These final goodbye talks took place over a series of Tuesdays over span of many months. 
    The book discusses a number of themes among them, the value of silence. 
    The author shares  a vignette describing a class he once had with Morrie in college. 
    Morrie came into class sat down and didn’t say anything. The silence stretched on and became deep and uncomfortable. Yet with the passage of time in silence, the students started noticing every little sound in the room. Some of the students became fidgety while others gazed out the the window in boredom until finally, Morrie, the professor, whispers “what’s happening here?”  
    And with that begins a discussion begins about the effect of silence on relationships. 
    Rabbi Boruch Leff also loved this section of “Tuesdays with Morrie” and he teaches that “noise let’s us ignore our most precious possession, our true and profound selves”. 
    The noise allows us to distract ourselves from dealing with what is truly happening around us. 
    Rabbi Leff shares that the Maharal, 16 th century commentator, teaches that speech is derived from the physical facet of a person, while silence allows one to tap into one’s spiritual dimension. 
    We are a soul with a body. 
    The body does best when it’s guided by the soul. 
    So the Maharal teaches, there is nothing better for the body than silence.  
    We can hear the quietest noises, we can hear our innermost selves, perhaps we can even hear our souls.
    Sometimes being silent is difficult. 
    There are also different types of silence. 
    Ever been subjected to the “silent treatment”? 
    Even though no words of anger are articulated, the anger that is expressed is sharp, biting and painful. 
    We almost want to cry out “just say something already, the silence is deafening!”
    This kind of silence creates distance, a wall which separates two individuals from one another. 
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  • Happy Purim 2022!

    Happy Purim Y’all!
    You may be thinking, is it Thursday night already?
    No it is not!
    While we did lose an hour with the changing of the clocks, you did not lose a day. 
    But, Purim is about the unexpected becoming reality, so even though you are not expecting to hear from me, Purim is here and we want to be in the mood!
    Today, Batsheva sent out a precious clip of her daughter Racheli, which was recorded a few years ago. In that short video, a young, but very poised and articulate child expressed a very sublime thought. 
    She shared that her teacher observed that the princesses we learn about in fairy tales are damsels in distress, waiting to be saved by their prince. 
    But Jewish princesses, (and I don’t mean JAPs, those who know, know) are courageous leaders who take the mantle and bring about the salvation as a result of their actions. 
    They do not wait for anyone to save them!
    Our Queen Esther is a case in point. 
    Esther was an orphan. Her father died before she was born, her mother in childbirth. 
    It is hard to imagine someone from such challenging circumstances becoming the queen who would save her people. 
    The Megillah, or scroll, Esther wrote, is a testimony to the eternal message she conveys to each of us. 
    After the Purim story concluded, Esther had to argue that her book would become canonized, as a part of the 24 books of the Tanach, but she was successful because the message of the book is for the ages. 
    In the Book, Esther reveals the secret of Jewish continuity, of Jewish survival. 
    The arch villain, Haman,  levels an accusation against the Jews, in his desire to find an excuse to be rid of us he states to the King of Persia, that the  Jews are scattered and dispersed among all the people in the provinces of the Persian realm. He is casting aspersions. 
    But, sadly, it is the truth.
    We had lost our sense of community, of purpose, of peace in our family. 
    So when Esther is asked to step up and plead for her nation in the face of imminent destruction she counters with an instruction of her own. 
    She commands Mordechai, her uncle, who is the leader of the Jewish nation, to gather the people. 
    She instructs all to pray for our salvation together. 
    Let them pray as a community that my plan to save our people will be successful. 
    She teaches us that only when we are united will we be able to overcome and  survive the annihilation attempt directed our way. 
    When Esther is ultimately successful in her efforts, she records the events in her book, words which are referred to as words of peace, and the book actually ends with the verbiage of peace, because she has succeeded in uniting us as one. 
    Not only does Esther leave us with the mantra of connection, she even gives us the practical formula to achieve this goal.  
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  • All we can do is treat each other with love and caring

    When I became a mother I spent a great deal of time choosing the perfect stroller. 
    I researched and investigated till I made my choice. 
    I finally bought the stroller of my dreams. 
    I hated it.
    The stroller was clumsy and hard to manage, unwieldy and annoying, but I had to live with my choice for a long time - at least until I could justify buying a better model. 
    Any Mom can relate to my story. 
    That is perhaps why the images of the empty baby strollers left by Moms for Moms at a train station in Poland, reduced me to tears. 
    It’s 2022!
    How could we be so quickly thrown back in time when mothers have become refugees overnight, escaping war and random destruction with their babes in arms and nothing else. 
    My own dear Mother ran from Germany in summer of 1939. She was a young child, and she and her parents escaped, almost at the last minute. 
    When they reached the border of Germany, they were removed from the train. 
    Their papers were not in order. 
    My Mother still talks of the pity she saw on the faces of the passengers who remained aboard the train. She was petrified. 
    The problem was corrected and they left Germany the next day. 
    That was more that was more than 80 years ago. 
    In the interim my Mom has lived, and please Gd will continue to live, a beautiful life. 
    However, a number of years ago she shared with my a shocking statement. 
    She told me that if you would wake her up in the middle of the night and ask her who she was, she said she would answer: refugee. 
    So much trauma, so much loss and loneliness. 
    It was only when she moved to Israel that my Mother felt she was finally home. 
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  • Have You Ever Felt Alone?

    Jewish Women’s Connection of Atlanta had the opportunity to participate in a Momentum retreat this past week. It was a wonderful opportunity to reconnect with dear friends and study together with the one and only team of Adrienne Gold and Lori Palatnik. 
    One of the activities that took place during the retreat was an eye opener. 
    It was called Stand For Your Sister. 
    Each person was given a questionnaire to answer anonymously. Some of the questions were superficial and even silly while others were deep and introspective. Once the form was complete it was handed in and the entire stack of papers was dealt out indiscriminately. Then the questions were read aloud. If your paper had a yes to the question read, you would stand. There was no embarrassment  as the answers we were responsible for were actually not our own. 
    (At one point Adrienne even commented that she had to remind herself that we were not actually standing for ourselves. Looking right at me she said, the question i just read is have you ever hid your Jewish identity and I am looking at Julie standing in a positive response which couldn’t be!
    I then had to reveal that I had indeed answered the question with a yes. I related the story of a business trip I had taken many years ago. I was going to a meeting in NYC and I was dressed to the nines, even sporting my Mom’s mink coat,faux of course, and feeling very sophisticated. As I waited at the luggage carousel, a Chassidic gentleman came over to me and in Yiddish, asked me if I could give him a ride to Brooklyn. I was so disappointed! How could he tell?!?  But I digress)
    There was only one question to which every one of us stood up, as one. And that question was...did you ever feel alone?
    Every single woman stood. Every woman not only stood with her sister,
    She stood for herself. 
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  • The Power of Community and Family

    Groundhog Day is a 90’s pop culture movie which portrays a person who is destined to relive the same day over and over again. An aspect of the story relates to the protagonist trying to create meaningful connections as the process of reliving each day makes him feel more and more alone. The success of the movie not withstanding, the film had a significant impact on popular culture as the term Groundhog Day came to mean a repetitive situation, experiencing the same thing over and over again. 
    This week’s Torah portion is called Vayakhel which means “and he assembled”. 
    This refers to Moses assembling the Jewish people as he prepares to charge them with building of the Tabernacle. 
    This might make you pause?
    Did we not have an entire portion dedicated (no pun intended) to the details of the building of the Tabernacle?
    We also know that every word, even every letter in the Torah is precious, none is redundant. 
    How could the Torah dedicate an entire portion to the repetition of the details regarding the building of the Tabernacle? 
    The key to the answer of this question is in the first word of the Parsha. 
    Vayakhel - and they assembled. 
    Sivan Rahav Meir, Israeli Torah teacher and media personality explains why it is so important for the Jewish people to recognize the strength in their unity. She relates a story of Abba Kovner, a leader of the partisans during the Holocaust. This man saw the worst of the tragedy of the Shoah, while experiencing the incredible bravery of many of the partisans, especially many young Jewish women who served as couriers on dangerous missions at great risk to their lives. Most did not survive. (Read “The Light of Days” by Judy Battalion for an in depth description of Kovner and his incredible efforts on behalf of the Jewish people). 
    In a speech he gave in Israel after the war, Kovner shares an incredible experience. He relates that despite the calamities he experienced, all of which could have broken him, he never lost his faith. (I had to read that a few times!)
    But, after  arriving in Israel, he went to the Western Wall and felt he did not belong, he was part of a different reality. As he stood, suspended in the limbo of estrangement, someone tugged at his sleeve and invited him to join the prayers as part of a minyan, the tenth needed to create a cohort for prayer. 
    Only then did Kovner feel he had arrived. 
    “My prayer and hope is always to be one of a group, that my good words will join with the utterances of other Jews”. 
    He had come home to his people. 
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  • Making Every Individual Count

    Last week we talked about feeling invisible. 
    It seemed to strike a chord. 
    Many strong, accomplished and successful women shared with me that they felt the words were speaking directly to them. 
    We need to take the time to really see the people in our lives. 
    Because even those who seem to have it all, are in need of attention, validation and empathy.
    Everyone needs to be seen for who they really are - everyone needs to count. 
    Rabbi Aryeh Levin who was known as The Tzadik (the holy man) of Jerusalem, for his selfless work on behalf of those in need, once came upon a soldier he knew, who was home on military leave. The Rabbi crossed the street, greeted the soldier and invited him home for a glass of tea. The soldier demurred. He felt he couldn’t join the Rabbi as he no longer wore a kippah. Rabbi Levin took the soldier’s hand in his own and said “I am short, I cannot see high enough to see you your head. But I can see your heart and your heart is big. You are a soldier willing to sacrifice for us all. Please come drink tea with me. Your kippa is bigger than mine.”
    Rabbi Levin saw to the heart of the matter. He could really perceive the man who stood before him. 
    This week’s Torah portion is called Ki Tisa, which means when you lift the head (of the Jewish people). 
    The portion begins with Gd commanding Moses to take a census of the Jewish people. 
    The methodology used to take the census is not by counting people, but rather by having each individual donate a half shekel coin and counting those coins instead. 
    Counting actual people is forbidden. 
    When you count people you objectify them. 
    We lose sight of the essence of the person. 
    Nonetheless Gd still commanded Moses to take a census. 
    Why?
    We are learning that a census is not about counting each individual, it’s about making every individual count. 
    That is why the Torah starts the census with the unusual language of lifting up everyone’s head, because when we recognize the special qualities of each individual we lift that person and help them realize their power and potential. 
    Sometimes we look at others through our glasses, and sometimes we see someone through the reflection of a mirror. 
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    Thank you for honoring a woman in our community, someone you love or their memory by dedicating a JWC Atlanta class to them.  Please complete the survey so we may properly honor them.  Thank you!

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Caryn Young
Caryn Young 1661sc