One of our daughters is blessed with a best friend. They have been like sisters since infancy. This is not a relationship to be taken for granted. These two are not peas in a pod. They are in fact polar opposites. From an early age our daughter loved to read. She would get lost in a good book to the degree that you couldn’t get any communication from her. Our daughter also loved sports-the ultimate tomboy- she was always ready for any ball game going. She had and has no trouble keeping up with her brothers. The best friend was the ultimate girly girl. Dolls, playing house and tea parties were her go to. There is one vignette, captured for eternity on a video, where our daughter is sitting with her nose in a book as her friend tries to get her attention to play dolls. All of a sudden our daughter notices the boys are beginning a game of basketball. As she heads out to join the game, her little friend says in frustration “just go, go alweady”.

If you are scratching your heads over this duo you are not alone. Yet, these two somehow were able to see above their differences, tap into what united them, to create and sustain a lifelong friendship. 

This week’s Torah portion is Shelach, which means send. The Jewish people had their encounter with Gd and Mount Sinai and now they are headed to the land of Israel. In anticipation of the upcoming conquest, the people requested a reconnaissance mission to spy the land. 

Gd acquiesces and responds to Moses with the words  “Shelach lecha anashim” send for you people, spies. Gd says if you feel the need to send out spies, so go already, and send them out. 

The journey from Mt. Sinai to the land of Israel should have taken eleven days. 

Instead it took 40 years. 

Did Moses not stop to ask directions?

What took so long?

It was the report of the spies that was the source of their downfall. 

The spies came back with frightful stories that frightened the people. 

The Kli Yakar, 16th century commentator notices that the the word for people, anashim, is the male gender. It was only men who were sent. 

The Kli Yakar comments that if only women had been sent, this whole debacle would have never taken place. The women had faith, they saw the miracles of the plagues and the splitting of the sea and they believed that the Land of Israel would be a place of blessing. 

Instead, the men returned from the spying with a bad report which bodes ill, and cried all that night. 

The commentaries ask why does it say “that” night?

Because they cried for naught that night and accepted an evil report against the land, they were destined to cry for a reason in the future on that night, when truly terrible things would take place for our people. 

“That night” was the 9th day of the month of Av, the date when in the future, both of the Temples would be destroyed in Jerusalem in 586BCE and in 70CE. 

This lack of faith, the inability to see the possibilities of a life in the land of Israel, resulted in a decree that all men between the ages of 20-60 would die in the ensuing 40 years in the desert, never to have the ability to go to Israel. 

During those 40 years, on the eve of the 9th of Av, these men would dig graves and lie in them. The next morning some of their number would not climb out of that grave. 

In this manner, the generation of men died in the desert, punished for their lack of faith. 

We can understand why that generation was punished for their lack of faith. 

But why does the 9th of Av continue to be a day of mourning?

The first Temple in Jerusalem was destroyed because we sinned the three cardinal sins, idol worship, murder and illicit relations. But 70 years later the Temple was rebuilt. Apparently we understood the punishment and learned from our mistakes. But the second Temple was destroyed for an entirely different reason. The second Temple was destroyed for the sin of baseless hatred. We were not able to see there is more than unites us than what divides us. 

And we have not righted that wrong. 

We are still judging one another unfavorably. 

I have a soft spot for graduations.

The attendees are in a great mood. 

Parents are relieved that their children have accomplished their goals and a tuition milestone is behind them. 

Graduates are relieved that they have accomplished their goals and a bright, perhaps scary, but possibility filled future lies ahead. 

And, the teachers are relieved that they have accomplished their goals and their charges are no longer their responsibility. 

The unrealized potential in the room is palpable. 

The possibilities are endless. 

The next part of the story is waiting to unfold and come to life as each individual progresses on the next chapter and will move forward - depending on their personal motivation. 

I had the honor of participating in two graduations today, one in person and one via zoom. 

Our granddaughter graduated from nursery school. I am not biased when I tell you her smile was ginormous and her performance stellar. 

But she absolutely won my heart when she ran off the stage momentarily to give her little sister a hug. 

Now, as sisters go, these two are close. But they still have their arguments, and the big sister is often frustrated and annoyed when the little one destroys her toys or art projects. It was heart warming to see that in this milestone moment, she put it all aside to give her sister a hug. 

The second graduation was in person. 

It was the commencement ceremony of a small girls high school. 

The charge to the graduates was offered by Rabbi David Goldwasser, a noted author and lecturer. 

He addressed this week’s Torah portion which is called Behaalotcha, which means when you go up. (That refers to the commandment to Aaron, the High Priest, regarding his going up to light the Menora in the Tabernacle.)

Rabbi Goldwasser referenced another incident in the portion where Moses is overwhelmed by his responsibility of tending to the Jewish people. 

They lodge a constant litany of complaints and Moses can take  it no longer. 

Moses tells Gd he cannot bear the burden. 

He just cannot do it. 

According to the Sages, Gd tells Moses you CAN do it, you have the hidden powers inside that you can accomplish great things. You just need to know how to unlock that potential. 

There was a famous Kabbalist known as the Baba Sali. He lived in Morocco in the early 1900s till he moved to Israel. (His granddaughter was my roommate!). When the Baba Sali lived in Morocco the area he lived in was dangerous and crime ridden. Going out alone at night was not recommended. One evening the Baba Sali announced to his attendant that at midnight he would be going to the ritual bath/Mikva as he was wont to do before any major occasion. The attendant was concerned but accompanied him in the dark. When they reached the door of the Mikva the attendant tried to unlock the door. No matter how hard he tried, the lock would not yield. Finally the Baba Sali took the key and the lock  turned effortlessly. 

He told his attendant 

“if you really want to open doors in this world, if you put all your effort into it, doors will open for you.”

Don’t have a fixed mindset. 

You CAN do it. 

A number of years ago I had the opportunity to hear a representative of the Jewish Agency address a meeting at the Jewish Federation of Greater Atlanta. 

He shared the dramatic story of his immigration from the Soviet Union to the United States. After leaving Russia, he received a scholarship to Yeshiva University in New York City. 

This young man was extremely dedicated and had a fierce work ethic. He worked long hours to learn English and succeed in his studies. One evening, the mentor who had been assigned to him, suggested it was time for a little break. He was concerned this Russian student would “burn out” under the pressure of the study regimen he had imposed upon himself. He therefore suggested the young man repair to the student lounge to watch some television. 

“It’s a good way to learn English so you won’t be wasting your time!”

The student acquiesced and went to watch TV. The mentor was surprised when a few minutes later the student emerged, wild eyed from the lounge. He was trembling as he told his mentor that inexplicably he had just found a relative of his on the TV show he was watching. 

The mentor asked for an explanation. 

It seems this student had a very close relationship with his grandfather. They spent many hours together through his childhood. Then came the when the grandfather felt his days were numbered on this earth. He called his grandson to his side and told him  about a special family symbol.  He raised his hands and joined the fingers together in an unusual formation. The thumb separated, the second and third fingers touching and the fourth and fifth fingers touching. 

“This is the symbol of our family, never forget this sign”. This was one of the last things this boy heard from his beloved grandfather. He never forgot. 

The student was shaking as he shared this story with his mentor, because while he was watching a show on television he was shocked to see a character making the same sign with his hands. His unique family sign. 

The young man concluded his story to us by saying he was probably the first person to find out he was Jewish from seeing Leonard Nimoy in his character Mr. Spock, perform the Vulcan salute in an episode of Star Trek. 

The Vulcan salute is actually an imitation of the hand formation used by the Cohanim, the Priests,  when they bless the Jewish people. 

This week’s Torah portion is called Naso and it contains within it the verses of the priestly blessing. 

May Gd bless you and protect you;

May Gd’s countenance shine upon you and be gracious towards you;

May Gd turn towards you and give you peace. 

This blessing is among the oldest of our prayers. 

We say it in our early morning prayers and in the prayer we say before we retire for the night. 

We intone the blessings on Shabbat, holidays, and in Israel, daily. It is a blessing that has accompanied us through our exile and is at the same time, a part and parcel of our present lives. This prayer is as much a part of us now just as it was thousands of years ago!

It is also the blessing we bestow upon our children every Friday night at the Shabbat table. 

What do we have in our hearts and minds when we utter the blessing over their bowed heads?

We want our children to feel safe, secure, loved and courageous. 

We pray they will move through life with compassion, empathy, resilience and determination. 

Rabbi Jonathan Sacks teaches us that most importantly, we envision a world where our children can live in peace. Rabbi Sacks says that in order to make peace in the world, we first need to be at peace with ourselves. 

How can we achieve inner peace? 

This is a time of great festivity in England. 

Queen Elizabeth, who has reigned for an unprecedented 70 years,  is being feted by her nation to celebrate this auspicious milestone. 

Earlier today, as the 96 year old Queen appeared on the famous balcony at Buckingham Palace to receive her subjects, the journalist who was commenting on the scene narrated that the Queen stood on this very same balcony, with her father, who was then King, in 1945, at the end of World War Two. 

This brought me to tears because my dear mother, a refugee from Germany, was witness to that event. She was eternally grateful to Great Britain for providing her a safe haven when she escaped Germany at the brink of war. She suffered the Blitz in England and many of the challenges of wartime, but was fully aware of the miracle of her escape from the clutches of the Nazis. She often speaks of the bravery of the royal family, who did not run away from London during the Blitz, throwing their lot together with the lives of their countrymen which exhibited true leadership. 

I felt very emotional seeing this diminutive woman who symbolizes strength in the face of adversity, the picture of royalty in our time. 

As my Mother’s father lived in London for the rest of his life, my Mom would take us to England every summer, to spend time with him. We enjoyed many of the sights, and watched the famous Changing of the Guards at Buckingham Palace many a time. 

Another ceremonial event that took place annually in London is called the Trooping of the Color. It is performed by regiments of the British army as they perform a complicated march in formation while carrying their colors, or their regimental flags. The Trooping is a moving testimony to the allegiance of the regiments to their sovereign as the maneuver in formation. 

This week’s Torah portion is called BaMidbar, which means in the desert, and it describes what life was like for the Jewish nation while they sojourned in the desert, in the wilderness. 

The Torah describes the encampment of the nation which was set up in a square. The 12 Tribes were divided into four sections, with 3 tribes encamped on each of the four sides of the square. Each Tribe had a unique flag, or banner, under which each Tribe dwelt.

Each flag had its own color for the Tribe it represented which corresponded to the colored stone on the breastplate of the High Priest which had the Tribe’s name engraved upon it. 

The flag also sported an insignia which represented the distinct characteristic of the Tribe. For example, the Tribe of Judah had a picture of a lion. 

(Hence the concept of Lion of Judah). 

The flags would identify the essential mission of the Tribe in their service of Gd. 

I was a little tired the other day as I was heading out to do an errand in my neighborhood. 

All of a sudden I arrived at my destination. I honestly do not remember how I got there. 

Scary as it seems, I was on automatic pilot, navigating the familiar route without focus or much attention. I did get there, but I missed a lot along the way. 

We are concluding the book of Leviticus this week. Many weeks ago we started the journey in this book which is called in Hebrew VaYikra which means “and he called”. It refers to the loving manner in which Gd speaks to Moses. 

If you would look in a Torah scroll you would see that the the word VaYikra, has its final letter aleph, written in a smaller font, so to speak, then the rest of the letters. That makes the word look like it’s actually spelling VaYikar, which has a totally different interpretation. Without the aleph the word no longer means he called out, but rather it means he happened upon. 

This reflects Moses humility when he was writing the Torah. He did not want it to seem that Gd singled him out and reached out specifically, but rather it was just happenstance. 

Moshe was just another guy, in the right place at the right time. 

This weeks Torah portion, Bechokosai, which means in my  laws, “happens” to use a similar word. 

The verse states, “If you behave casually with me” is a warning to us regarding our relationship with Gd. In the verse the word for casual is “keri” the same root word as VaYikra. In other words do not relate to Gd casually, as if you just happened to run into Gd. 

Furthermore, the portion talks about observing the Mitzvot and commandments but uses another interesting choice of words. Literally the verse says, 

“If you will walk in my laws”. 

Shouldn’t we observe the laws, not walk in them?

And what serendipity!

In the verse that exhorts us not to behave casually, it literally says “if you will walk with me casually”…

It doesn’t seem a happenstance walk with Gd is what we are aiming to achieve. 

The metaphor of walking which repeats itself is the message of growth. An angel, according to Jewish mysticism, has only one leg. 

An angel has the spiritual energy to complete its mission, but it has no choice, it must proceed, like a robot, to complete its task. 

A human being has choice, where and how to walk, to continually grow and expand. 

We are constantly presented with options and we can decide to purposefully walk with Gd or meander through life thinking there is no purpose to our existence, that it’s just a matter of chance. 

How do we walk with the Mitzvot?

I just returned from a trip to Israel. I am blessed to visit with my Mother who lives in Jerusalem, and spend some wonderful quality time with her. I appreciate every minute I am gifted with my Mother’s company. 

We played a lot of Scrabble. 

I love a good game of Scrabble. The challenge of creating words out of disparate letters is one I relish. Of course taking the jumble of letters and creating a 7 letter word is especially satisfying. 

The longer the word, the greater the points. 

This is a common place illustration of the importance of a word, especially a well constructed one. 

This week’s Torah portion is called Behar and one of the topics it addresses is words. 

The Portion continues the theme of holiness which has been the focus of the past few portions. First the Torah had addressed the holiness in our relationship with Gd and now it shifts to holiness in the foundation of Jewish society. 

In Behar the Torah states that one person is not allowed to afflict another. This injunction is actually mentioned twice.

What does it mean to afflict someone? 

There are two ways one can afflict another. 

One way is by negatively affecting or harming someone’s money or property. 

An interesting application of this law regards window shopping, a widely accepted practice many of us enjoy. 

What could be wrong with window shopping?

Imagine you are a shop keeper and someone enters the store. 

Your antennae goes up!

A potential customer. Immediately your hopes rise in anticipation of a sale. 

If the shopper had absolutely no intention to buy anything the shopper is afflicting the shop owner  by giving a false impression that a sale may be imminent. 

Why is this action prohibited?

Simply because it will disappoint the seller.

This is one act of affliction that is to be avoided. 

Why?

Because it will cause someone pain. 

That level of sensitivity creates a refined spirit. 

The Talmud states that if one enters a store with absolutely no intention to make a purchase,it is prohibited. 

Do not panic. 

All is not lost. 

Be a mensch!

Did anyone ever tell you that? (Like your Mom? In dulcet tones, maybe when you were acting up a bit in public?)

What does being a mensch even mean?

The Oxford English Dictionary defines a mensch as a person of honor and dignity. 

Still not quite sure what the parameters are of being a mensch. 

Perhaps the following story is an example of menschlickeit, the action of being a mensch. 

In 1948 Alaska Airlines president James Wooten had purchased some surplus transport aircraft from the US military. He really was not sure what to do with his purchase. Then he was apprised of a need and stepped into the breach. 

After the declaration of the State of Israel in 1948, violence erupted in the Middle East. One of the areas of conflict was Yemen, and the Jewish population of Yemen was attacked and persecuted. They were desperate to escape to Israel. They could not travel by boat as the Egyptian army was patrolling the Gulf of Aqaba, so Operation on Wings of Eagles was launched. James Wooten was contacted and he oversaw 450 flights transporting Yemeni Jews to Israel. He used his newly purchased cargo planes. Many of these flights he piloted personally. This was a dangerous operation, avoiding enemy airspace and often enemy fire, flying long stints and taking turns to get much needed sleep. Other challenges included the fact that this ancient Jewish community had never seen an airplane before and despite the danger, were hesitant to board the aircraft. “Despite many challenges Alaska Airlines proudly executed the mission without a single loss of life” (courtesy of Mishpocha Magazine)

Would James Wooten be considered a mensch?

I think so!

This week we have experienced many emotions. 

First there was Yom Hazikaron, Israel’s Memorial Day, a day dedicated to fallen soldiers and civilian victims of terror. 

This somber day of appreciation of those who made the ultimate sacrifice, giving up their lives for the safety of the Jewish people, is immediately followed by Yom HaAtzmaut, Israel’s Independence Day, the day when the State of Israel was formally established in May of 1948. 

The linking of these two days is clear- we owe our independence to the soldiers who sacrificed their lives for it. 

This year the cycle was closed with a return to tragedy as Yom Haatzmaut ended and a terror attack against Israeli civilians resulted in the death of three fathers, leaving 16 orphans. 

This act was applauded by the terror organization in a statement. 

One of the Dad’s who was murdered is portrayed in a picture with a wide and engaging smile. His friends and neighbors say he was someone who always had a smile on his face and was always eager to assist others. 

His name was Yonatan Chabakuk and everyone in his city knew him. 

He always had a smile. 

He leaves behind a wife and ten children. 

Our hearts are broken and we cry for their loss. 

This week’s Torah portion is called Kedoshim, which means holy ones. 

At the beginning of the Parsha we are commanded to be holy. 

What follows are the steps, the Mitzvot, by which we can attain holiness. 

One might assume that the theme of reaching spiritual heights would be by abstaining from worldly pleasures and by removing oneself as much as possible from the mundane of life. 

Yet the theme of the commandments which bring us to holiness include honoring parents, pursuing righteousness and loving your neighbor as yourself. As well as the injunction not to steal, or tell lies, or delay paying a day worker their salary. We are told not to gossip or place a stumbling block in front of another, not to bear a grudge, take revenge and to stand up for the elderly!

All these are part and parcel of real life - the components of interpersonal relationships that form the fabric of our lives. 

We become holy when we elevate every aspect of our daily life. 

When we smile at one another. 

Today was Yom HaShoah, the annual Holocaust Remembrance Day. 

It is a solemn day which focuses on the six million Jews who were murdered by the Nazis in World War 2. 

In Israel, at 10 a.m in the morning, sirens blare throughout the country. 

For what seems an endless two minutes, sirens wail mournfully and the country comes to a standstill to honor those who perished. 

It is eerie to see what unfolds when the siren sounds. 

People literally stop in place, drivers pull over and stand somberly near their cars, everything becomes frozen in time. 

Today, something very precious  coincided with the sounding of the siren. 

A 90 year old Holocaust survivor, Mr. Nathan Weinberg, was serving as a Sandek, the honor of holding the baby, at his great grandson’s Brit Milah. Wrapped in his talit and teffilin, Mr. Weinberg held the baby on his lap while it was being lovingly ushered into the holy covenant of theJewish people. 

As the Brit was concluding the siren rang out. 

The officiants paused, and the camera focused on the emotional expression on the great grandfather’s face as the baby and the siren wailed in synchronization. 

The emotion in the room was palpable. 

The crying of new life in concert with the siren which represents death, symbolized  Mr. Weinberg’s victory.  

He defeated the Nazis by building a life in the face of his loss. 

At this Brit, he is celebrating the birth of his 49th great grandchild. 

This is Mr. Weinberg’s personal victory over Hitler, building eternity after a long, dark chapter of death and destruction. 

This week’s Torah portion is called Acharei Mot, which means after the death. 

It refers to the time after the death of two of Aaron the High Priest’s sons. 

After that tragic event, Gd teaches Aaron about the sanctity of the Tabernacle and the holiness of the Yom Kippur holiday. 

Rabbi Yaakov Bender, beloved Torah leader in New York, shares a beautiful thought to help us understand a relevant message. 

Aaron responded to the tragedy of this unspeakable loss, in silence. 

He faced the pain with dignity and calm. 

This is not because Aaron was unable to speak. He was well known as the master mediator who brought peace amongst those who were in conflict. Aaron was also chosen by Gd to be his brother Moses spokesman, so he clearly is a man of words, but in this instance Aaron remains quiet, here he chose silence. 

Rabbi Bender explains that this is only part of Aaron’s response. The other reaction was his filling the void left by his loss with more holiness. He created and built a new reality in the Tabernacle that would replace what had been lost.

Because of this elevated response, Gd spoke directly to Aaron and taught him the laws regarding holiness in the Tabernacle. Specifically, that a priest may not participate in the Temple service in a state of intoxication. 

This law was transmitted in a direct speech between Gd and Aaron. 

Just as Aaron sanctified himself by NOT speaking inappropriately, Gd honored him by speaking to him directly. 

Our Sages teach us that while a drunkard may be more excited in his spiritual yearnings, he is not serene, and without composure he cannot fully experience the sanctity of the moment. 

Gd was telling Aaron, you showed your faith by reacting to this blow with calm and composure, you will therefore merit being the one to teach all that Divine service can only be done with composure and concentration. 

In this way, Aaron was able to teach one and all there is a chapter that comes “after the death”, he modeled that there can be life after a very dark chapter. 

(We are not on the level of Aaron’s spiritual development, nor were we intended to aspire to that level. He was the High Priest, and we are not expected to respond as he did, but we can glean the lesson he modeled of finding strength to move on)

That is the chapter of 

“after the death”. 

We worked so hard!!

We planned, shopped, prepared, cooked, and ate. 

A lot. 

And Passover is passing us by. The final days of the holiday are upon us. 

What spiritual energy is in the air? 

What choices can we make to take the power of Passover with us, long after the matza crumbs have been swept away?

The final days of Passover celebrate the splitting of the sea. Therefore they are celebrated as a major festival, as they testify to this seminal event. 

Over 3000 years ago, the Jewish people escaped Egypt. When The Egyptian leader, Pharaoh, realized he had allowed his slave force to flee, he had second thoughts. He corralled his army and gave chase to the Jewish nation. He cornered them at the edge of the Sea of Reeds. 

The Jewish people were trapped. 

Before them lay the sea and behind them the approaching Egyptian army. There seemed to be no escape. 

Moses raised his voice in prayer and Gd told him this is not the time for prayer, this is a time for action, the people should just go forth. 

Easier said than done. 

Going forward seemed suicide by drowning. 

One man, Nachshon the son of Aminadav, who was the Prince of the Tribe of Judah, took the charge to heart and began walking forward into the water. 

He continued walking as the water lapped around his ankles and he did not stop as the water rose until it reached his nose, and when it seemed his demise was inevitable, the unimaginable happened and the sea split. 

This Friday we commemorate that event that took place 3,334 years ago. 

We remember the person whose faith and initiative made it happen. 

The Talmud teaches us that a person can actualize their potential, complete their mission in one moment, in one hour, so to speak. 

That was Nachshon’s moment. 

He changed the trajectory of history with his action. 

It was heroic and historic. 

A Nachshon moment.