Lieutenant Yaakov Elian fell in Gaza one month ago. Sivan Rahav Meir met with Keren, his sister, at a memorial service for him that was held at the elementary school — Emunim in Givatayim — the he attended as a child. Keren made a request of those who were there as follows:
“This coming Shabbat is the Bar Mitzvah Shabbat of Yaakov when we read the Torah portion of Bo. It would please us if everyone who reads and studies this Torah portion would do so in the merit of Yaakov ben Yoram.”
So here is a verse from the parasha, in memory of Yaakov, that we can learn: “In order that you should tell it in the ears of your son and your son’s son . . . and you shall know that I am the Lord.”
In other words, the Exodus from Egypt has just begun and already Gd proclaims: The day will come when you will tell this story to your children and your children’s children. You must know today that everything is going to be fine. Just remember that you are part of a great story. In the future, there will be a new generation and everything that happens now will become history for them, and you should speak of it to your children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren. What you have endured has been difficult, painful, and is seared into your soul, but so is faith and hope . . . This message was pertinent not only to the generation that left Egypt, but is pertinent to us as well.”
This is indeed a very pertinent message as this week’s Torah portion describes the very first Passover Seder.
The 10 plagues culminate in the celebration of the Seder in Egypt and it includes instructions that we are always to remember the lessons of the Exodus and the reason we reenact the Seder annually is so that we will always remember leaving Egypt and all that it encompasses.
One of the laws regarding the Passover sacrifice was the instruction not to break any bones of the animal while consuming the meal. In other words, no breaking the bones to suck out the marrow.

100 is a big number.
If you get 💯 on your test you feel you have accomplished a great feat.
In Judaism 100 is represented by the the letter Kuf which is the first letter of the word Kedusha or holiness.
That too is a word denoting completeness.
January 14, 2024 will equal 100.
But it is not a time of accomplishment or sanctity.
It will mark the passage of 100 days since the hostages have been abducted.
Rachel Goldberg, the mother of Hersh Goldberg Polin has taken to noting each day of her son’s captivity by taking a little piece of masking tape, writing the number in black marker, and wearing it on her shirt over her heart.
Rachel is asking us to do the same on January 14 and post pictures to help raise awareness to bring her son Hersh home.
Where does she find the strength?
Hadas Levinshtern is the mother of six children and a recent widow, whose husband fell in Gaza battling Hamas.
She was recently visited by a group of fellow American Jews who were hoping to bring her some comfort. The indefatigable Shai Graucher brought gifts to the children and he was introducing the visitors to Hadas.
Then an unexpected turn of events occurred. Hadas was giving strength to her visitors. They were expressing their sympathy regarding her situation and she began strengthening them regarding theirs.
She was referencing the state of antisemitism in the US and especially on college campuses. She told her visitors that if anyone they know is scared and wants to take their mezuzah off their door or remove their Magen David necklace they should call her. She is offering to be a source of comfort and support to them to be proud Jews.
Where does she find the strength?
I just heard of two Israeli, only Hebrew speaking mothers, who want to fly to Washington DC in a desperate bid to engage with high ranking officials to plead on behalf of their daughters who are still hostages.
Where do they get their strength?

How are you?
That’s an innocuous question.
People throw it out mindlessly.
They may ask the question and not even wait to hear the answer.
Nowadays, however, it’s a difficult question.
You feel silly asking it.
It’s almost inappropriate.
Many are struggling with so much as we continue to wait and pray for the hostages to come home, wait and pray for our soldiers to come home safe and sound, pray for the safety of the Jewish people worldwide.
But people are still going to ask that question.
It sort of slips out when you least expect it.
So here are two responses that hit a chord with me.
(Because answering “fine” is not going to cut it).
Rebbetzin Tehilla Jaeger of NY responds to the question by answering
“Grateful and Begging”.
I love that answer.
It reminds us that we are indeed blessed on so many levels, while constantly being aware that we are vulnerable and there is so much more we cannot do without.
Sivan Rahav Meir shared that she was recently paying a shiva visit to a family who had lost their son in battle in Gaza. The father mentioned to Sivan when he people ask him how he is he answers
“Learning, Learning”
This is a breathtaking answer on so many levels. Here is a recently bereaved father who does not answer in anger or bitterness. He realizes that he does not understand the ways of Gd, nor may he understand why things are happening, but he is learning so much about his son, others and even himself, during these difficult times.
We may not understand why events are unfolding, but we are given unexpected windows into the minds and thoughts of some people, people we would never had the opportunity to meet under regular circumstances.
It’s sn opportunity to learn and be inspired.
We are introduced to names.
The names we hear are often those of the fallen soldiers.
Every morning I wake up and check the news holding my breath. I almost can’t breath as I look to see the “names that have been cleared for publication.” That means the army has already informed the fallen soldier’s family and now we, his extended family are given the name, which is accompanied by a picture of a beautiful, young person, taken from us too soon.
At the same time we are given an opportunity to celebrate the names. They don’t disappear into obscurity because certain people are making sure we know the person behind the name. We are given a glimpse into the greatness of the person and the impact they have left behind during their short sojourn on earth.
These glimpses may come from family members, mothers, fathers, siblings, or they can come from a comedian.
That is not a joke.
Hanoch Daum is an Israeli writer and journalist who is known for his comic take on society.
Of late, Hanich Daum has become very serious.
On a daily basis he profiles the story of someone we have lost.
He wants to make sure that their memory will not be lost.
We are introduced to the person inside the uniform, as Daum shares some of the dreams and accomplishments of the fallen soldier.
He also highlights the names and struggling businesses of soldiers who are in active duty, reminding all to frequent the place of business which has been neglected because it’s owner has picked up arms to protect us instead of protecting their own interests.
There are names that we are being introduced to that should become household names to us.

There is an old Jewish joke.
An actor was out of work.
He responded to an ad placed by the zoo.
It turned out that the main attraction, a gorilla had died, and they couldn’t afford another.
So they hired the actor, put him in a monkey suit, and solved the problem.
The actor embraced the role. He began swinging from trees and living the part. One day, in his exuberance while swinging from one branch to another, he accidentally overshot his mark and ended up in the lion enclosure. As the lion advanced menacingly, teeth bared, the “gorilla” saw his end was upon him and instinctively, as Jews have done from time immemorial, he cried out
“Shma Yisroel”
He was shocked when the “lion” responded the appropriate liturgical response
“Boruch Shem Malchuso lOlam VaEd”
Without skipping a beat, the “panda” from the next cage called out
“Cut it out you Shlemiels, you want to get us fired?!?”
This week’s Torah portion is VaYechi.
It is the final portion in the Book of Genesis.
Our Patriarch Jacob’s life is coming to a close and he gathers his children together to pass on the traditions from father to son. He wished to reveal to his sons what would occur at the End of Days. But when he wanted to share the prophecy, the Divine presence left him and he was unable to continue.
Jacob feared that perhaps the loss of prophecy had occurred because one of his sons was unworthy. After all, his grandfather Abraham had two sons, Isaac and Yishmael and only Isaac was worthy to carry the tradition. And then Isaac had two sons Jacob and Esau and again only one was worthy, perhaps he too had such a son that was not devoted to Hashem.
Our Sages teach us that this is the moment when the sons said as one, Shma Yisroel Hashem Elokeinu Hashem Echad, Hear O Israel, we are solely devoted to Hashem.
And that is when Jacob responded and declared
Baruch Shem Kavod Malchuso LOlam VaEd
Let His great Name be blessed forever and ever.
Rabbi Tzvi Sytner expressed it so well when he says
“The Shma expresses our complete devotion to Gd, regardless of life’s circumstances. We are recognizing that everything is part of the Divine orchestration. Every time we cover our eyes and proclaim Gd’s unity, we are essentially stating that regardless of what is in front of my eyes today, regardless of whether life is delivering me celebration or tribulation, I cover my eyes and declare my devotion, no matter what is in front of me”
As the days of this war continue, the tragedy continues to unfold as we lose so many beautiful souls.
The stories that accompany us in our hearts give us inspiration and insight into our brethren as they are on the front lines.

Sivan Rahav-Meir Meir, Israeli correspondent and Torah teacher shared a message she received from a reservist who is fighting in the war.
“Shalom Sivan from a reserve unit in the south. Tomorrow, Friday, is the fast of the 10th of Tevet. Many will not fast because they are serving in the military, and I am among them.
But I already heard about several people who said that they never fasted on this day in the past but they will try to fast tomorrow. In my eyes, this is significant. Where were we during the Yom Kippur fast and where are we today?”

Friday is the 10th of Tevet which the day on which the siege of Jerusalem began in 425 BCE. The Babylonian enemy surrounded the walls of the city on the 10th of Tevet, broke through the walls on the 17th of Tammuz and, ultimately, on the 9th of Av, the Holy Temple was destroyed.
This fast is unique among fasts as it is observed even when it falls on a Friday and may interfere with Shabbat preparations.
It is viewed as a highly significant day as it is the beginning of the chain of events that culminated in the destruction of the first Temple. Even though there was a second Temple subsequently, it never matched the glory of the first, and all the suffering and exile that have come are also a consequence of that tragic beginning.
Fasting may seem to be counterintuitive.
Usually Jewish fast says memorialize bad things that have happened to us and we are supposed to use the fast day as an opportunity to understand the loss we experienced and correct the mistakes which caused them.
I personally am not a good faster.
By the end of the day I am often feeling more like a wet noodle than a person who has undergone the serious work of introspection.
I am more worried about making it through the fast.
So what is the point?
Our Sages teach us that by abstaining from food and drink we strip away the distractions and focus on what is truly important to us.
What are we really living for?
What really brings us happiness?
Is the fabulous food I was planning to consume for my next meal what defines me? Is that what brings me true joy?

It’s the eighth night.
Chanukah is almost over.
It always slips by so quickly.
Not for the hostages.
They are desperately waiting to see the light of day.
What are we doing to help them?
Have we called the President today?
Have we called the Red Cross?
Have we engaged in good deeds in their merit.
Have we prayed?
Tonight, the last night of Chanuka, and tomorrow, the last day of Chanuka, has a special designation.
It’s called Zos Chanuka.
Literally translated as
THIS is Chanuka.
If Chanuka has slipped through our fingers, don’t worry, this is the most important part.
There is a Chasidic parable about a Rabbi who came very late to an appointment as the day was waning.
A cynical bystander asked if the appointment was of little consequence and therefore the Rabbi had just pushed it off and waited til the last minute to make his meeting.
Quite the contrary, answered the Rabbi, we know when we go to the market place all the best deals are available just before closing, so I am showing up now to get the most for my money, in this case arriving late will provide the most impact.
So too the last day of Chanuka.
There is still so much spirituality to be gained.
There is still a chance to change and connect.
The Rabbi of Ruzhin compares Zos Chanuka to Yom Kippur and says that on THIS day, a regular person can achieve the same heights that a holy person can achieve on Yom Kippur.
What do we do?

Tonight we lit the first candle of Chanukah.
It feels like the days of yesteryear.
The miracle of Chanukah was twofold.
Yes when the Cohanim, the priests in the Temple wanted to light the Menorah they were only able to find one cruse of pure oil which would only burn for one day. It would take eight days to get more oil.
The oil ended up lasting for a full eight days.
And that is why we celebrate.
But there was another miracle.
It was the battle that was won despite the overwhelming odds against us.
It was the might of the Greek empire, using their tanks (ie elephants) against a small band of brothers.
And yet, despite the ridiculousness of the situation, the Jewish people prevailed.
We need another miracle.
The times seem so dark now, we need the lights of our people to lead the way.
And there are so many lights.
Story upon story of courage on the battlefront and the home front, as we band together like brothers and sisters to engage in the battle for our lives.
How will we do it?
Once again it is uncanny how the Torah Portion is speaking to us.
This week’s Torah Portion is Vayeshev, and it tells the story of Joseph, the beloved son of Jacob, and the travails he encounters.
Rabbanit Yemima Mizrachi, beloved and inspirational Torah teacher from Israel shared the following incredible thoughts and I want to share her insights with you.
Rabbanit Yemima was just in Munich, she addressed a conference of European Rebbetzins who are seeking guidance on how to lead their sisters in these very challenging times.
When the Rabbanit was in the airport to return home, she suddenly heard terrible screaming. She saw the screams were coming from an Israeli young woman whose fiancée had just been killed in the fighting in Gaza.
It was such a deep and bitter cry, a cry of darkness overcoming the light.
It made the Rabbanit think of how our Patriarch Jacob cried when he was told that his son Joseph was dead. Jacob blamed himself, he had sent Joseph to inquire after his brothers and he felt he had failed to protect him.
That is what the parents of our fallen brave soldiers are grappling with right now.
They feel they failed to protect their kids and they are grief stricken.
Joseph is actually not dead, but he has been put in a pit, underground. He has been abducted.
He has no idea what has happened to his Father, is his Father alive?
He doesn’t know if his family knows where he is and where he has been taken.
It’s an eerie foreshadowing of the exact circumstances today.
Hostages abducted, being held underground, we not knowing their fate, they not knowing the fate of their loved ones.
The parallels continue.
The story continues as well.

This week’s Torah portion, VaYishlach, talks about how to prepare for a war.
It is uncanny how every week we are being sent such timely messages.
Jacob is returning home after years away.
But it’s not going to be one big family reunion.
His brother Esau is indeed coming to greet him, but he’s fortified his welcome committee with 400 men.
That’s a message to Jacob that he is still harboring anger over his mistaken understanding over the loss of his birthright.
(Selective memory here, he actually sold it to Jacob)!
Jacob strategizes over the coming encounter.
He engages a three pronged approach.
He first tries diplomacy by sending gifts to Esau.
He taps into Esau’s mindset and provides peace offerings that should speak to Esau’s desire.
Lest that not be successful, Jacob engages in a heartfelt dialogue with Gd, a meaningful prayer. Jacob prays that Gd should save him from Esau
“For I fear lest he come and strike me down, mother and children”.
Jacob knew that if Esau were to fight, he would have no compunction about attacking the women and children.
Sounds like a modern day scenario, how little has changed in the world of barbarism.
And finally, if all else fails, he prepares for war.
Menachem Begin, former Prime Minister of Israel studied these verses carefully before engaging with Anwar Sadat. He followed our Sages dictum that these verses are the protocols required before engaging with the enemy.
Our nation is at war.
Our women and children are under siege.
We are utilizing all the above means at our disposal to ensure victory.
For those of us, in America, far from the front lines, we may wonder if our prayers actually make a difference.
I have to share with you an unbelievable story.
I can vouch for it as I know some of the players personally.
There is a soldier in Israel, he is a 38 year old dentist, Dr. Eitan, a reservist, who was called to duty in Gaza.
Right before they began a dangerous sortie, the soldiers were handed a pile of letters written by children in America.
Dr. Eitan grabbed a letter and read what a little 10 year old girl named Emma Platt had written. She addressed it to “A Soldier” and she told him she was davening (praying) for him and that he was doing a good job for the Jewish people.
Dr. Eitan was deeply moved that a little girl on the other side of the world was praying for him. It gave him renewed resolve to face the danger ahead.
He tucked her letter into his combat vest, along with notes from his own family and the little wrist band from his newly born son. (Another story!)
Then he went into battle.
He was on the third story of a building when it was hit by an RPG.
The building collapsed and he fell three floors.
His survival was a miracle.
He was airlifted to a hospital in Israel.
He was visited by some Americans while in hospital and he told them how he felt the prayers and letter of Emma Platt played a role in his survival.
He asked them if they could help him find Emma Platt.
One of the visitors in the room assured him they would.
The visitor reached out to a young woman in America who has a podcast for kids. Since the war, she has about 3000 children joining her nightly for inspiration and prayer on behalf of our soldiers.
She found Emma.
This all happened live on her podcast.
She emotionally told the kids that each of them is also an Emma, because they are dedicating themselves to pray on behalf of our soldiers, and they should always remember that each prayer makes a difference.
They may not be privy to the final details, but their actions count, as we do vividly see from Emma’s efforts.
Emma and Dr. Eitan were connected via Zoom.
He had the opportunity to thank her for her letter and prayers and how much it meant to him, and she told him again that he was doing a great job.
Dr. Eitan was visibly moved by Emma’s dedication and composure.
Emma promised to visit him on the next family trip to Israel.
She lives in Hollywood Florida.
The power of prayer of a child.

Happy Thanksgiving!
According to the primary source for everything, you might think I mean the Torah which is the primary source for everything, but in this instance I was referring to Google,
Thanksgiving, which occurs o the fourth Thursday in November, is based on the colonial Pilgrims harvest meal which took place in 1621. It is celebrated to appreciate the blessings of the past year.
Rabbi Kalman Rosenbaum, former principal of Torah Day School in Atlanta, often intoned that every day is Thanksgiving Day.
Did he not know Google’s definition?
Rabbi Rosenbaum was familiar with the primary source mentioned above, the Torah, which inextricably intertwines the Jewish people and gratitude.
The Jewish people are called Yehudim in Hebrew.
The source for this name is found in this week’s Torah portion, VaYetze.
In this portion, our matriarch Leah, who is married to Jacob, gives birth to her fourth son.
She names him Yehuda.
The root of the name Yehuda, means gratitude.
Leah was expressing her thanks to Gd for the birth of her fourth son.
The Talmud states that since the time of creation, no one ever expressed gratitude to Gd as Leah did.
This is actually curious, because the Torah shares others who expressed thanks to Gd.
How is Leah’s thanks on a different level?
Rashi, the super commentator, explains that Leah knew that her husband was supposed to have 12 sons. As Jacob was married to 4 wives (it was Biblical times, and it wasn’t easy then either) Leah did a calculation and deduced that it was likely she would bear 3 sons.
When she delivered a fourth and unexpected son, Leah felt that this gift, which went beyond what she expected, deserved a special level of thanks.
Leah realized that even though her life was part of a Divinely ordained plan, everything that happened is a gift from Gd and should not be taken for granted.

When I write my weekly Parsha musings, I type it directly onto WhatsApp and disseminate from there.
Last week when I was trying to type my thoughts I couldn’t get the typing to work.
It kept jamming.
You might think this has to do with my lack of technological skills and you probably would be correct.
But the reason I was having such a hard time is that my phone was in constant action.
You see, I had signed up to participate in a WhatsApp group that was reciting consecutive Tehillim, chapters of Psalms.
This is an age old practice of the Jewish people to tap into the spiritual arsenal of the Psalms of King David.
His words are a powerful tool which can be used to combat evil, acquire heavenly merit and protection, while providing tranquillity to the soul.
During times of challenge, one of the first Jewish responses is to grab a Psalms, (called Tehillim in Hebrew) and tap into the heavenly assistance they provide. The Psalms can be recited in Hebrew or English.
In these difficult times, many are saying Tehillim.
The particular WhatsApp group I am referencing is open every day from 4 pm EST until midnight. This group was formed as a response to soldiers who said they need spiritual fortitude to continue to fight. Many of their operations take place from 11pm at night till 7am in the morning, so this group says Tehillim constantly during that time to inspire Heavenly protection.
We know that Prayer can change the reality and bring about miracles.
This week’s Torah portion is called Toldot.
It begins with the prayers of our matriarch Rifka and our Patriarch Yitzchok, colloquially known as Isaac and Rebecca.
They were praying to be blessed with a child. Rebecca was unable to conceive, and according to the natural course of events, she would not be able to have a child.
But the prayers they sent heavenward were so powerful, they were able to overturn the reality and create a new one, resulting in the birth of twins.
The word used in the portion is Vayeetar, and they prayed. That particular version of prayer is one that overturns the reality and creates a new one.
The Talmud teaches us that the root of Vayetar is the same root as the Hebrew word for pitchfork, an Eter.
Just as a pitchfork uproots the ground underneath and displaces and replaces it and moves it from place to place, so do the prayers of the righteous move Gd from the place of judging harshly to another place, judging with mercy.
These days have been very dark.
As we hear and read of the experiences of our brothers and sisters, our hearts are torn to shreds.
But there are many miracles that abound.
Let me share two with you.