Do your kids make fun of you?
Hopefully the teasing is lighthearted and gentle in nature.
The jokes usually tend to tease out deeper family dynamics.
When the children are younger it may reflect the embarrassment they feel due to our behavior (teens anyone).
When they are older the trading may reflect that they secretly appreciate the family quirks but are not quite ready to embrace it.
Hence the teasing is hopefully in good fun.
One of the areas that’s gotten a great deal of response in our family is what has become known as the “bless-fest”.
When we part from our children or grandchildren we give them a blessing.
We learned this custom from our Rabbi and mentor.
We saw that when he was saying goodbye to his offspring, he would always send them off with a blessing.
It’s really a powerful idea.
Our children go out into the world and encounter all types of challenges. We have the opportunity to arm them as best as we can with positive upbringing, instilling good values, teaching them to look both ways before they cross…and also with a blessing.
Can’t hurt.
Certainly makes them feel like we love them.
But sometimes it’s annoying.
Especially when many of them are leaving at the same time, or if they are in a hurry.
Hence the “light hearted” teasing.
But they’ve come to expect it.
And hopefully like it.

This week’s Torah portion is called VaYechi and it is the closing portion of the book of Genesis.
Genesis or Braishit focuses on the family of Abraham which is the building block or basis of the Jewish people.
Hence we can expect some important lessons about family in this closing chapter.
The theme of the portion is blessings.
It relates the unique blessings Jacob bestowed on all his children before he passed away.
The portion also contains the blessings Jacob gave to his grandsons.
Those blessings are emblematic of Jewish continuity. The blessing that Jacob gave his grandchildren are the very same ones we use to bless our children.
It is a widespread custom to bless the children Friday night with those ancient words.
Stop for a moment.
We use the exact words that our patriarch Jacob used about 4000 years ago.
That’s really the concept of LDor VDor, from generation to generation, coming alive.
Giving a weekly blessing to a child is more than just connecting to ancient heritage. It can become a treasured moment in our week when we look our precious child in the eye, really really see them, and confer a heartfelt blessing.
We use the tried and true formula gifted to us by Jacob, and we can continue with our own words of love, appreciation, and even sharing something we might have noticed that week regarding a success that the child achieved.
Big or small.
It all works toward building the love, and the child will feel the love and the noticing.
Rabbi Paysach Krohn tells the story of a man who had a child with a severe neurological condition. The gentleman attended a conference which addressed the specific issues of his child. A pediatric neurologist was attending the conference for professional reasons and the two men became friendly and shared information on the disease.
The layperson was attending the conference locally, the neurologist was visiting from out of town.
Both gentlemen were Shabbat observant, so the local man invited the doctor to spend Shabbat with his family. The gentleman had been speaking a great deal about his son who suffered from the malady, but as they neared his home he told the doctor that child was going exceedingly well and therefore it would be impossible to tell which of this person’s many children was actually ill.
After a lovely Shabbat, the neurologist thanked his host and prepared to leave.
His host challenged him to identify the child who was ill and the neurologist pegged him without hesitation.
The father was shocked, the child’s symptoms were practically undetectable.
The neurologist told him he was correct.
The only way he was able to tell which child was ill is because the father spent longer blessing that particular child Friday night.
So take advantage of the chance to bless your children.
It’s a precious moment of closeness you can train them to endure.
But really the gift is to ourselves, because it reminds us that the children themselves are the blessings.
And we never want to forget the blessings that are our children.
Last night we were privileged to marry off our son, author of the term “bless-fest” and with hearts full of gratitude, we pray that he in turn will bless his children, and they will make fun of him!!
Shabbat Shalom and so much love!!