Lieutenant Yaakov Elian fell in Gaza one month ago. Sivan Rahav Meir met with Keren, his sister, at a memorial service for him that was held at the elementary school — Emunim in Givatayim — the he attended as a child. Keren made a request of those who were there as follows:
“This coming Shabbat is the Bar Mitzvah Shabbat of Yaakov when we read the Torah portion of Bo. It would please us if everyone who reads and studies this Torah portion would do so in the merit of Yaakov ben Yoram.”
So here is a verse from the parasha, in memory of Yaakov, that we can learn: “In order that you should tell it in the ears of your son and your son’s son . . . and you shall know that I am the Lord.”
In other words, the Exodus from Egypt has just begun and already Gd proclaims: The day will come when you will tell this story to your children and your children’s children. You must know today that everything is going to be fine. Just remember that you are part of a great story. In the future, there will be a new generation and everything that happens now will become history for them, and you should speak of it to your children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren. What you have endured has been difficult, painful, and is seared into your soul, but so is faith and hope . . . This message was pertinent not only to the generation that left Egypt, but is pertinent to us as well.”
This is indeed a very pertinent message as this week’s Torah portion describes the very first Passover Seder.
The 10 plagues culminate in the celebration of the Seder in Egypt and it includes instructions that we are always to remember the lessons of the Exodus and the reason we reenact the Seder annually is so that we will always remember leaving Egypt and all that it encompasses.
One of the laws regarding the Passover sacrifice was the instruction not to break any bones of the animal while consuming the meal. In other words, no breaking the bones to suck out the marrow.

We know that all the laws given are instructive for all time, what can we derive from this particular one?
The writer of the Seder HaChinuch, a 13th century explanation of all the mitzvot, shares a light on this unusual Mitzva.
It’s a psychological insight.
The Jewish people are about to emerge from hundreds of years of enslavement. Not only would they be throwing off the physical shackles of imprisonment, they also had to shed the slave mentality that was deeply rooted in their psyche.
They need to begin to think and act like free people, people of nobility.
A person of standing does not break a bone and suck out the marrow for the last vestige of nutrition. That is the behavior of a slave who doesn’t know from where the next meal will arrive.
The incredible lesson we derive from this Mitzva according to the Sefer HaChinuch is that a person is formed and informed as a result of their actions.
If you behave as an oppressed person you will only think of yourself as an oppressed person.
Therefore, in order to
Impress upon ourselves new and positive behaviors which will transform us, we must actively engage in the behavior, over and over again.
Multiple reps in the gym will result in bulging muscles.
So too, repetitive acts of generosity will result in a generous personality.
Our hearts and psyches will be pulled by our behaviors and result in a better version of ourselves.
Sivan Rahav Meir met a woman whose husband is serving in the army. She changed the ringtone on her cellphone to a song which is called “they will not defeat me״
The song by Naomi Shemer talks about a person looking out a window and seeing regular life unfolding.
“Suddenly it becomes clear
And I say to myself
You won’t beat me
I am not being defeated so fast”
Sivan asks about the message of this song. Why does Naomi Shemer see the mundane activities occurring outside her window and then utter that we won’t be defeated?
Sivan explains that the way to defeat terror is by our nation continuing to live daily life, to continue to participate in the routine actions, to create and build.
They won’t defeat us.
Sivan shared these words at a gathering of young women who are bravely maintaining the home front while their husbands serve on the battle front. And she says we won’t be defeated as these brave women are day by day making the sandwiches for their kids.
Those daily actions.
The routine uninterrupted by the challenge.
A person is a result of their actions.
Keren wants us to remember her brother by learning a verse in his memory and merit, so that Ya’akov Elian will be remembered by the words of Torah we speak.
And the brave women who are upholding the nation one sandwich at a time, their repetitive and seemingly mundane actions speak volumes,
We are not being defeated so fast!
Shabbat Shalom and so much love!