I was a pretty good student back in the day. I prided myself on getting good grades and I was somewhat of a goody goody, following rules and always doing what I was told.
There was however, one class that I lost my grounding.
Sewing.
(Nowadays is that even a thing?)
Everything that could go wrong went wrong for me in sewing class. I just couldn’t get the hang of it.
Case in point.
We were supposed to be making a skirt. I bought beautiful polka dotted fabric. The teacher instructed us to wash the material before we would begin the pattern. To my horror, after I washed the fabric, all the polka dots popped out.
Try making a skirt with fabric that is all bumpy instead of smooth and flat.
And then another strange thing happened. Instead of being the quiet studious one, I was constantly making jokes. I was clearly compensating for my lack of success by distracting the other students.
It was definitely not the best version of myself.
The days of summer are winding down. While the heat persists in many locations, there are hints that we are moving toward a new season.
Camp is over.
School is back in session.
And, today is the first day of the Hebrew month of Elul.
This is a time of new beginnings as we embark on the month which leads up to the High Holidays.
Elul is a time for introspection.
It’s a time when we take stock of ourselves in preparation for the next stage, the new year.
When one runs a business concern, a company in good standing does regular reviews to make sure they are delivering their product, meeting their goals and fulfilling the mission of the firm.
Elul is called an Et Ratzon, which can be translated as a time of mercy, a time when you can own up to our mistakes, return and be forgiven.
But an Et Ratzon is also a time when Gd wants to know our Ratzon, which can also mean desire. What do we want or desire from our selves. When we do a self review are we on target to fulfilling our destiny, to become the best version of ourselves.
This is the time to take our good intentions for ourselves, our desires, our Ratzon, and make sure we are delivering.
This week’s Torah portion is called Shoftim and it speaks about the judicial system of judges and police who are in place to create boundaries and safety.
There is also a discussion about cities of refuge. These cities were instituted on behalf of people who killed someone unintentionally. These cities were a haven and a place for the person who killed by accident and could stay safe from family members of the victim who might seek revenge.

Rabbi Wolbe, a Torah teacher of great magnitude from this past generation, teaches that the month of Elul can be compared to a city of refuge.
It is a time for us to take a step out of reality, a time to be used for introspection and self evaluation.
Rabbi Wolbe would encourage taking time during the month of Elul to reflect and meditate, taking some time from the hectic pace of life and school to reconnect with one’s self and begin that annual review.
The Chasidic masters understand this concept on another level.
They ask, who might WE have “killed” accidentally?
It may be a child, a relative or a colleague who has borne the brunt of our wrath.
When we embarrass another it is as if we have “”killed” that person. In their moment of shame which we caused, the blood rushes from their face and they become “deathly pale”.
Or perhaps we have accidentally “killed” ourselves by underestimating our potential and not “living” up to who we can be, even under the most difficult circumstances.
In some Hasidic dynasties it is a custom at the wedding to list the illustrious family from whence the bride and groom come. At one particular wedding, a match was made between a bride from a family with a royal heritage to a young man from humble origins.
As was the custom, the bride’s side expounded on her illustrious forefathers.
Then it came time for the groom to list his.
Everyone waited with bated breath to see how the groom could ever match his wife’s lineage.
The young groom shared that his father was a simple tailor who died early in life. But he did remember a teaching in tailoring from his father.
“It’s never too late to fix what you have sewn. If you see the wrong stitch, you can take it out and start again.”
When the great Chassidic Rabbi , the Rizhiner Rebbe, who was the patriarch of the bride’s side heard these words, he announced that the groom did indeed come from great lineage, as the wisdom imparted by his father is eternal, just as important as who your ancestors may be.
The custom to invoke the list of our ancestors is not to be snobby or elitist, rather it is because we hope to attain their greatness. They hold the bar for us to strive toward.
The “simple” tailor had such wisdom which can guide us to greatness.
This is a time of year when we recognize that we are stitching together the parts which comprise ourselves. If we have missed a step, or a stitch, we can make it right, for ourselves and for those we love.
We just take out the stitch and resew.
It’s a great snippet of wisdom for all of us who are working on tailoring our lives to fit our souls a bit better.
Shabbat Shalom and so much love.