Day 237
Every day of these 237 we have seen pictures.
Photos of smiling young men and women, in the prime of their lives.
And then we learn they are no longer with us on this planet.
The heart breaks again and again as we contemplate the shattered lives and broken souls who are left behind.
Many days it is too much to bear.
But we are given glimpses into the greatness of those we have lost and we are left breathless by their faith, determination and bravery. It makes us stand taller, squaring our shoulders as we brace ourselves to try a little harder to emulate them.
And what of the families they have left behind?
They are the true warrriors.
This week there was a Brit Milah. The mother of the baby, cradling the newborn in her arms, is flanked by her toddler and her own mother and grandmother. All are surrounding her in a circle of love, strength and support.
Rabbanit Yemima Mizrachi was there.
Her reaction was not pity.
Rather she sees the scene and exclaims that we are a nation of lionesses.
She could see the power emanating from these women.
They will persevere and continue on.
I watched an interview of a bereaved mother.
She lost two daughters at the Nova festival. She shared about these two sisters, the light and joy they brought to her and to the world.
And while she is forever going to mourn them, she will also continue to live for them, having their spirit always with her, always feeling their presence, every single moment of her life.
She will not stop living she will honor their lives by living her own.
And their constant presence, she said, will be her inspiration.
For a bereaved parent, child or spouse, the grief is always a part of their new normal.
Rabbi Moshe Hauer teaches us the reality of this situation through the lens of this week’s Torah portion.
This week we will read the last Parsha of the book of VaYikra, the book Leviticus, which is called Bechukotai.
In it Gd promises to remember his covenant with Jacob and also Isaac and Gd will recall Gd’s covenant with the Abraham.
This refers to the promise that Gd makes that even if we have strayed and we are being dreadfully punished, at the end we will be remembered and redeemed.
The sentence is quite convoluted. It seems the remembrance and recalling is only connected to two of the three Patriarchs, Abraham and Jacob? What about Isaac? Why is there no need to remember him?
Rashi, the super commentator, explains that Gd does not need to remember Isaac, as his “ashes” are always piled before Gd.
(This refers to the Binding of Isaac. Gd commanded Abraham to sacrifice his son Isaac and Isaac was willing to subject himself. The deed never actually took place, but because Isaac was willing, it is as if he was brought a sacrifice and the ashes are symbolic.)
Since those ashes are always present there is no need to remember that which is still and always, there.
Rabbi Hauer shares that this unusual statement can be seen as a reciprocation from Gd.
Abraham was ready to sacrifice his son. In his mind the deed was done. He was therefore considered a bereaved parent.
A bereaved person carries their loss with them always. With the passage of time they learn to live again, they learn to function, but there is always the absence of their loved one tugging at their heart.

So Gd said, if Abraham is willing to sacrifice his child and therefore carry that loss with him for the rest of his life, then Gd too will always carry that readiness to do Gd’s will, the remembrance of that commitment.
The ashes will be with Gd forever. Because Gd understood that this act of sacrifice by Abraham would not be a momentary one, rather it would accompany Abraham every day forever.
This is a message we need to internalize in these difficult times.
For those who have lost loved ones in the past 237 days
“their grief is a presence, not a memory”.
It is incumbent upon us to continue to recognize the sacrifices they have made, on our behalf and continue to support them in any possible way.
Rob Mor found a way.
Rob is award winning filmmaker who lost his wife at the age of 31, five years ago.
After her passing he experienced a devastating grieving process.
After October 7, Rob traveled to Israel and was asked to meet some of the recently bereaved widows. He agreed as he felt that having experienced the same loss, he might be able to bring them a modicum of hope and support. He was so inspired that he crested a documentary of these strong and resilient women. Rob was inspired by the strength of those he met.
His documentary Echoes of Loss: Eight Days in Israel, shares the stories of people who suffered loss after October 7.
Rob says he made the film wanting to give hope to himself and to all those he met.
He uses his camera as a weapon to fight the hopelessness and give strength.
This week we end the book of Leviticus.
The custom upon finishing one of the five books of the Torah is for the community to chant and call out loud the Hebrew words
“Chazak, Chazak, VNitchazek”
Be strong, be strong and may we will all be strengthened.
These words of encouragement have never been more timely or needed.
There are different explanations as to why the words are repeated.
Perhaps it is to remind us that the only way we can go forward is if I say to you - be strong, and you say to me - be strong, and then together we will be strengthened to move on, leaving space for each others pain, recognizing the losses will always be present, and together forging forward.
Chazak Chazak VNitchazek dear ones!
Shabbat Shalom and so much love!