Today was the 9th day of Av. It is customary to spend the day in mourning as we immerse ourselves in the tragedy of the day.
Part of the day revolves around the recitation of Kinnot. These are liturgical poems which evoke the pain we have experienced throughout exile. Some of the poems focus on the destruction of the Temple. Others focus on the Crusades and pogroms that happened to the Jewish people. There are also more contemporary Kinnot which commemorate the Holocaust and the events surrounding it.
For many years, our family worked in a summer camp in the Catskill Mountains in upstate New York. This is a family owned camp, and they have many beautiful customs which have become part of the camp experience.
On Tisha BAv, they have a custom to sing a unique tune to one of the Kinnot. The manner in which it is sung, brings the poem to life.
The Kinna contrasts the emotions of the Jewish people in two particular circumstances.
The first line of each stanza recalls the joy felt when we experienced a particular aspect when we left Egypt, a time of miracles, great happiness and the palpable presence of Gd.
That line of the stanza is sung aloud and joyously.
The next line in the stanza focuses on the same idea but looks at it through the lens of a different leave taking, this one being when we left Jerusalem.
That exit was somber and tragic. The Jewish people were being exiled from their land, and now the sad mood is reflected in a serious tune and a lowered voice.
The contrast of the two scenarios is shocking and extreme.
For example, one stanza focuses on the people who led us.
When we were leaving Egypt, we had Moses who provided for us and Aaron the High Priest who guided us, they were the leaders who provided succor.
However, when we left Jerusalem, the two protagonists who were larger than life were Nebuchadnezzar and Hadrian, the Roman leaders who brought tremendous destruction to our people and to our land.
The song transports us between the extreme high of Salvation and then plummets to the lowest low of Exile.
From Redemption to Exile.
From Galut to Geulah!
It’s an incredibly moving rendition.
As an introduction to each Poem/Kinna, one of the educators frames the lesson we can take away from the poem.
Today, our son, spoke about this Kinna.
He shared the true story of an Israeli young man who was dating, with matrimony being the object.
He was having a difficult time as he unfortunately sported a large and disfiguring scar on his face. It served as a deterrent to the young ladies.
He turned to his mentor in despair. The Rabbi told him that the next time he had the opportunity to date a young lady, he should immediately tell her the story of how he acquired the scar.
Soon a blind date was arranged and upon meeting the young woman and making the appropriate introductions, he immediately launched into his tale.
“You might wonder about the scar on my face” he began.
He then proceeded to tell the story of his excursion to a park once with his parents. While he was at the park, he heard blood curdling screams. Without a thought for his own safety, he ran towards the screaming and saw a terrorist attacking a young woman. He managed to throw the terrorist to the ground but in the process of subduing the perpetrator he received a slash across the face from the knife wielding terrorist. Shortly thereafter security forces arrived and he was rushed to the hospital to tend to his injuries.
As the young man concluded the story he noticed his companion’s blood had drained from her face, she looked completely ashen.
She whispered that she had tried for the past few years to discover his identity as she in fact was the one he had saved.
The story concludes most satisfactorily with their nuptials.
The scar, which had been his impediment, became the agent of his success.
The Kinna which celebrates the successes and then bemoans the failures brings to light that each of these are really two sides of the same coin.
We can celebrate the good that happened to us, but when we acknowledge the bad if we can see that it was the vehicle for growth, we can see the potential it provided.

The Hebrew words for exile and salvation are almost the same.
One is Galut or Gola the other is Geula. In Hebrew the letter which is different between them, which transforms one to another is an Alef.
That Alef stands for Gd, Elokim, which begins with an Alef.
It is Gd who can change a situation from exile to redemption in a moment.
But the Alef can also stand for Ani, me.
The one who can change a situation from one extreme to another is none other than me.
I can look at a challenging situation and view it either as a dead end, or something that will only bring to destruction of self, or I can view this challenge as an opportunity for growth, an expanding of horizons that will open doors and lead to - redemption.
It’s all up to Ani - me.
Today I also had the opportunity to hear an incredible group of women who shared how the challenges of their lives have uncovered strengths they never knew they had.
One of the women shared her story. After 12 years of infertility she had a beautiful baby boy. Within an hour of his birth he underwent inexplicable organ failure. He hovered between life and death and suffered oxygen deprivation. He did survive. He is now 15 years old but cannot speak or walk or feed himself. She and her husband devotedly care for their child.
She shared many aspects of how she has grown, but one of the things she shared was so real. She shared that when she was a teenager she had no interest in sports or much physical activity. She therefore was not good at sports nor did she have much physical strength. In the years before their child was born, she and her husband volunteered at a camp for severely disabled children. Then their own child was born and was extremely disabled. Her work in that camp prepared her so much for the care of her own child.
But the physical care of her own child gave her something else as well.
Muscles.
The constant lifting of her own child has built up her physical strength.
When she goes to work in the camp and the strapping teenagers rush to help her, she says, I’m good, I’m stronger than you are!
She said Gd gave her the strength, literally and figuratively to lift the load.
She concluded her remarks by saying “ I don’t believe how strong I am!”
We leave the sad days of Tisha BAv and return to life with gusto.
How do we do that?
How can we switch so rapidly from exile to consolation?
It is only with the knowledge that is up to each one of us, to the Ani, to revel in the celebration but to also mine the challenges for the nuggets of gold that lie beneath the surface.
Life is the dichotomy of redemption and salvation, but when we are really in touch with the messages they are really one and the same - an opportunity to build those “muscles”.
Shabbat Shalom and so much love.