When I was newly engaged, I spent the Shabbat of this weeks’s Torah portion, Chayei Sarah, at the Yeshiva, the Rabbinical seminary, where my future husband was studying. My then Chattan, or fiancé, had tragically lost his mother a few years prior. On the eve of her daughter’s wedding, the mother in law I never knew, collapsed and passed away. It was of course a source of grief for my husband and his whole family. Is verse in this weeks Torah portion brought my husband some comfort. His mother’s name was also Sarah, and the verse describes that Isaac brought his bride Rivka into the tent of his mother Sarah and he was comforted. The Torah is teaching us that Rebecca emulated the ways of Sarah, and by bringing life again to Sarah’s legacy, she brought comfort to the mourning Isaac.
The Torah portion is called Chayei Sarah which means -the life of Sarah. But the title seems to be a misnomer because the subject of the Parsha is about her death, not her life.
Rabbi Y. Frand, a teacher in the above referenced Yeshiva teaches that although the Parsha is about Sarah’s death it really is a reflection of her life and the legacy she left behind. Even though the Parsha shares details about Sarah’s demise it also directs us to understand that we, the Jewish people, are only here, thousands of years later, because of Sarah. What she left behind is alive.
There is a famous phrase
“You can’t take it with you”, as Rabbi Frand humorously states, you will never see a hearse with a luggage rack.
But the real meaning of that phrase is that when a person leaves this world it’s not about what she can take but rather what she has left behind.
A legacy.
The impact one makes on the world is defined by the children they leave as well as the mitzvot, the good deeds, the charity they leave, the impact they have made on the world.

That impact a person makes is the legacy that remains.
We should not think there is nothing that is left behind, rather so much remains.
This past week, after 11 years of agony, the remains of Lt Hadar Goldin were brought to rest in Israel.
The whole country let out a collective sigh as this news became public. We were all devastated by the murder of this bright and deeply spiritual young man, and we watched the family’s journey of suffering with deep feelings of compassion.
At the funeral, Hadar’s mother Leah spoke about her son’s incredible qualities. She referenced the unimaginable wait and the despair that threatened to engulf them. Whenever they reached such a nadir, someone would remark “what would Hadar say?” And referencing his deep faith and positive attitude, Leah said that they actually only made it to this day - because if him. He was a person who saw the best in others and encouraged the youngsters in his care to be good and kind to others and he made sure to be a source of inspiration to those in his orbit.
In her eulogy his former fiancée spoke about his mega watt smile, his positive energy and his attitude of growth. When he was killed she felt like that incredible presence had disappeared from the world but now she realizes that although he is gone physically, he has left behind these incredible qualities and they are still present.
It is Hadar’s legacy and it will live on eternally.
These challenging times are full of so much pain. But if we focus on the life well lived, the life of Sarah, the impact she made that is still felt thousands of years after she walked this planet, we will get a glimpse of the profound impact we can make.
We can imitate Hadar’s care and concern for others or er can replicate his ear to ear smile. We may feel the loss, the death, but by taking little pieces of the greatness that person brought to the world we keep them alive.
That creates a legacy, and that is eternal.
Shabbat Shalom and so much love!!